17/11: Monsieur ArrrRRRPAKASSO!'s diary

Greetings, mortals.

I am finally free to use the internet because my owner has gone to the loo. It has been a miserable week of my existence.

My owner was mostly at home today and she talks non-stop. To herself. Her inane chattering drives me crazy. I think she already is crazy. Good lord, I don't want to be like her. Do insane people know they're insane? If they do, are they still insane?

My top breed arpakasso fur is losing its shine. Help. I don't know what to do.